As your parents transition into senior living, it might not be as easy for them to engage in former family activities. Combined with your growing responsibility for checking in on their health and well-being, this can make visits feel strange or awkward. If you’re feeling uncertain about how to adjust to the changing relationship while still providing the support and connection they need, try following these steps. 

How to Engage with a Senior Loved One

1. Slow Down

Your day may be jam-packed with tasks and to-dos, but senior living tends to happen at a slower pace. Make sure each visit includes time for relaxed chatting, or even the chance to sit in companionable silence. Because they’ve been self-reliant for so long, seniors can struggle with asking for help. A longer, less structured visit gives them more opportunities to share their current needs.

2. Ask Before Making Changes

As roles shift, it can be tempting to take on new responsibilities automatically. But studies have shown that older people place a high value on autonomy. They may feel judged or ignored if your entire visit is spent tidying the living room or reorganizing the fridge. 

Do watch for changes in the home’s organization, as these can be a signal that they need more support. If any issues appear, gently bring up the situation in casual conversation. They may explain that the change was a deliberate choice, or they might admit that they’re having trouble with certain tasks. Take your cues from their attitude. Offering to work on a task with them can help them feel like you’re staying engaged in the visit.

3. Eat a Meal

Shared family mealtimes are linked to improved nutrition and health. Cooking a meal also gives you the opportunity to make sure your parent’s cupboards and fridge are well-stocked with nutritious foods. If the shelves look bare, decreasing mobility or memory issues might be making it harder for them to shop. 

Other seniors struggle with depression, and lower activity levels might suppress their appetites. The comforting ritual of a family meal will strengthen your relationship and boost healthy communication about any issues. 

If your loved ones are struggling with loneliness or day-to-day tasks, reach out to CrossLove CDS. Based out of Clayton, MO, this home health care team knows all the ins and outs of senior living. Their dedicated team can help you select and train a friend or family member to take on a companion care role. Visit their website to learn more about their unique consumer-directed service program. You can also contact their professional care coordinators by calling (314) 452-9091.